|Air| "The Days We Went A-Gipsying." I Would All Womankind Were Dead, Or Banished O'Er The Sea; For They Have Been A Bitter Plague These Last Six Weeks To Me: It Is Not That I'm Touched Myself, For That I Do Not Fear; No Female Face Hath Shown Me Grace For Many A Bygone Year. But 'Tis The Most Infernal Bore, Of All The Bores I Know, To Have A Friend Who's Lost His Heart A Short Time Ago. WheNe'er We Steam It To Blackwall, Or Down To Greenwich Run, To Quaff The Pleasant Cider Cup, And Feed On Fish And Fun; Or Climb The Slopes Of Richmond Hill, To Catch A Breath Of Air: Then, For My Sins, He Straight Begins To Rave About His Fair. Oh, 'Tis The Most Tremendous Bore, Of All The Bores I Know, To Have A Friend Who's Lost His Heart A Short Time Ago. In Vain You Pour Into His Ear Your Own Confiding Grief; In Vain You Claim His Sympathy, In Vain You Ask Relief; In Vain You Try To Rouse Him By Joke, Repartee, Or Quiz; His Sole Reply'S A Burning Sigh, And "What A Mind It Is!" O Lord! It Is The Greatest Bore, Of All The Bores I Know, To Have A Friend Who's Lost His Heart A Short Time Ago. I've Heard Her Thoroughly Described A Hundred Times, I'm Sure; And All The While I've Tried To Smile, And Patiently Endure; He Waxes Strong Upon His Pangs, And Potters O'Er His Grog; And Still I Say, In A Playful Way, "Why You're A Lucky Dog!" But Oh! It Is The Heaviest Bore, Of All The Bores I Know, To Have A Friend Who's Lost His Heart A Short Time Ago. I Really Wish he'd Do Like Me When I Was Young And Strong; I Formed A Passion Every Week, But Never Kept It Long. But He Has Not The Sportive Mood That Always Rescued Me, And So I Would All Women Could Be Banished O'Er The Sea. For 'Tis The Most Egregious Bore, Of All The Bores I Know, To Have A Friend Who's Lost His Heart A Short Time Ago.