I Who Would Be A Merman Gay, Singing Alone, Sitting Alone, With A Mermaid'S Knee, For Instance - Hey - For A Throne? Ii I Would Be A Merman Gay; I Would Sit And Sing The Whole Day Long; I Would Fill My Lungs With The Strongest Brine, And Squirt It Up In A Spray Of Song, And Soak My Head In My Liquid Voice; I'd Curl My Tail In Curves Divine, And Let Each Curve In A Kink Rejoice. I'd Tackle The Mermaids Under The Sea, And Yank 'Em Around Till They Yanked Me, Sportively, Sportively; And Then We Would Wiggle Away, Away, To The Pea-Green Groves On The Coast Of Day, Chasing Each Other Sportively. Iii There Would Be Neither Moon Nor Star; But The Waves Would Twang Like A Wet Guitar Low Thunder And Thrum In The Darkness Grum - Neither Moon Nor Star; We Would Shriek Aloud In The Dismal Dales - Shriek At Each Other And Squawk And Squeal, "All Night!" Rakishly, Rakishly; They Would Pelt Me With Oysters And Wiggletails, Laughing And Clapping Their Hands At Me, "All Night!" Prankishly, Prankishly; But I Would Toss Them Back In Mine, Lobsters And Turtles Of Quaint Design; Then Leaping Out In An Abrupt Way, I'd Snatch Them Bald In My Devilish Glee, And Skip Away When They Snatched At Me, Fiendishly, Fiendishly. O, What A Jolly Life I'd Lead, Ah, What A "Bang-Up" Life Indeed! Soft Are The Mermaids Under The Sea - We Would Live Merrily, Merrily.