When I Went To The Bar As A Very Young Man, (Said I To Myself Said I), I'll Work On A New And Original Plan (Said I To Myself Said I), I'll Never Assume That A Rogue Or A Thief Is A Gentleman Worthy Implicit Belief, Because His Attorney Has Sent Me A Brief (Said I To Myself Said I!). I'll Never Throw Dust In A Juryman'S Eyes (Said I To Myself Said I), Or Hoodwink A Judge Who Is Not Over-Wise (Said I To Myself Said I), Or Assume That The Witnesses Summoned In Force In Exchequer, Queen'S Bench, Common Pleas, Or Divorce, Have Perjured Themselves As A Matter Of Course (Said I To Myself Said I). Ere I Go Into Court I Will Read My Brief Through (Said I To Myself Said I), And I'll Never Take Work I'm Unable To Do (Said I To Myself Said I). My Learned Profession I'll Never Disgrace By Taking A Fee With A Grin On My Face, When I Haven't Been There To Attend To The Case (Said I To Myself Said I!). In Other Professions In Which Men Engage (Said I To Myself Said I), The Army, The Navy, The Church, And The Stage (Said I To Myself Said I), Professional License, If Carried Too Far, Your Chance Of Promotion Will Certainly Mar And I Fancy The Rule Might Apply To The Bar (Said I To Myself Said I!).