Of All Life'S Plagues I Recommend To No Man To Hire As A Domestic A Deaf Woman. I've Got One Who My Orders Does Not Hear, Mishears Them Rather, And Keeps Blundering Near. Thirsty And Hot, I Asked Her For A Drink; She Bustled Out, And Brought Me Back Some Ink. Eating A Good Rump-Steak, I Called For Mustard; Away She Went, And Whipped Me Up A Custard. I Wanted With My Chicken To Have Ham; Blundering Once More, She Brought A Pot Of Jam. I Wished In Season For A Cut Of Salmon; And What She Brought Me Was A Huge Fat Gammon. I Can't My Voice Raise Higher And Still Higher, As If I Were A Herald Or Town-Crier. 'T Would Better Be If She Were Deaf Outright; But Anyhow She Quits My House This Night.